Mid Ice Crisis

by Seamus Boyle (7th) and Luke Dinan (7th)

Recent events have baffled the hockey community after a puck fired from the stick of none other than Jerome Jace III struck the King of Globlagoo, Peter William—otherwise known as PW—and broke his nose. The king was rushed into immediate surgery.

Jerome will now receive a suspension from the NRHL (Non-Real Hockey League), which is, of course, totally a real hockey league.

According to recent sightings, the king is now traveling with five to six bodyguards out of fear that a stray hockey puck may come flying out of nowhere. Sources say he plans to press charges, stating, “I have suffered trauma and will need therapy for this!”

Meanwhile, the Globlagoo Grizzlies are struggling without their captain. With a crucial game against their rivals, the Placeland Pirates, approaching, they’re going to need a miracle.

Many citizens of Globlagoo suspect Jerome committed this act on purpose. After all, he plays for Placeland—a team notorious for doing anything to win.

Placeland residents were outraged by the accusation, insisting it was purely an accident. We have not yet heard from the Pirates’ coach, but the Grizzlies’ coach had plenty to say about the Pirates. Most of it cannot be printed here (there are kids reading, after all). However, one thing is clear: he does not believe Jerome acted alone. In fact, he claims the Pirates’ coach may have put him up to it.

Stay tuned—this rivalry just got personal.